THE HISTORY AND WHY IGBOS DON’T PAY BRIDE PRICE ON A PREGNANT MAIDEN – OUR CULTURE EXPLAINED
Before the arrival of white missionaries, Igbo land had strong moral laws. Bride price was not for buying a woman. It was a sign of appreciation to the father for having imparted strong morals on his daughter. It was proof that she kept herself pure.
In Igbo custom, it is almost like an abomination to give birth when not married. Our ancestors said “Adịghị eke nwanyị dị ime afọ”. If a lady got pregnant before marriage, she stood the risk of being ostracized until the gods are appeased. Paying bride price over a pregnancy is seen as covering an abomination with money, and Ala, the earth goddess, does not accept it. That is Nso-Ala.
In Igbo culture, if you don’t pay the bride price of a girl, any child she births belongs to her father and her community. This was done to ensure that the child has rights, a place in the community and not treated as an outcast. You cannot claim ownership of the child and also rush to pay bride price while the pregnancy is still in the womb. Tradition demands that she must first deliver, then the necessary cleansing and rites are done, before any marriage discussion.
Today, due to Western influence, many families, especially some mothers, aid their pregnant daughters to marry without their fathers knowing. No right-thinking Igbo man would give out his pregnant daughter’s hand in marriage until she delivers. When we break this law, we invite unseen consequences into our lineage.
Our elders believe that violating Nso-Ala brings spiritual problems to the family – ranging from unexplained difficulties, unstable marriages, and children with afflictions that have no medical root in the lineage. That is why you see things our fathers never saw before ,If a maiden is pregnant, let her give birth first. Let the father of the child take responsibility, do the required rites to appease Ala if needed, then come properly to ask for her hand in marriage.
Culture is our identity. When we lose it, we lose ourselves. Let us preserve what our ancestors preserved for us.
